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Thursday, April 16, 2009

Day 5...and I Didn't Kill Anyone

Day 5 on my journey to stop smoking tobacco cigarettes using my new Electronic Cigarette and I feel like I'm coping well.

I have yet to kill anyone.

I woke on day 5 feeling like I'd taken a horse tranquilizer the night before.....groggy, slow, unable to think clearly. I mentioned to my oldest daughter how I'd been feeling, sort of wondering out loud how long it would be before I felt normal again. And what she answered stunned me and got me thinking....

"Maybe this IS your normal, mom. You have been smoking for almost 30 years, your body doesn't remember what normal is."

Wow. OK......first off, I certainly HOPE my normal isn't a drooling, slow, depressed, spaced-out, sleepy, groggy, achey, hacking, coughing recovering addict! If that's the case, it's no wonder I started smoking! I'm kidding.........I understand what she meant and I know my body has alot of changes to go through...............and boy, is my body changing!

At night, seems my body wants to purge the toxins via my pores. I wake up with my hair stuck to my neck, bangs plastered to my forehead and fight to peel the damp blankets from my body. I'm still sleeping alright, though it seems I'm dreaming more. My upper chest has gone from discomfort to out and out PAIN and my cough is much more productive. The dizzy spells are still there, but less frequent and much less severe.

The new symptom I'm suffering through is stomach pain.......kind of like sharp, stabbing cramps. Nothing alarming, but definitely something I read I should expect.......not fun. As a matter of fact, I got this fleeting thought to start smoking again just so I could stop the withdrawal pains and misery. I said "fleeting"........as I quickly told myself I was insane to even allow that thought to cross my mind.

I did have a comforting picture in mind......me being put in a drug induced coma, tied to a bed and sleeping my way through the rest of these withdrawal symptoms. Ahhhh, that would be nice, but of course, who would feed my dogs, take care of the house, run the errands, find everything my family has lost for the day, cook the meals, do the wash etc, etc, etc, etc? Again, my mind trying to find comfort kicking these poisons out of my body.

The good parts of this quest are starting to reveal themselves and I'm starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel! My "fog" cleared early in the afternoon and I felt pretty good (aside from the stomach pains). I have found myself automatically reaching for my Electronic Cigarette now rather than thinking about tobacco first. My skin is starting to look brighter. I'm beginning to get my normal appetite back. And most importantly, I beginning to feel pride in what I'm doing! I'm actually proud of myself! YAY ME!

Soooooooooo, I'm now off to have a great day 6. Am planning on walking my dogs today and enjoying the warm sunshine, Let's see how my lungs react to some exercise and fresh air!

1 comments:

aNiTa HeLeNa said...

Hang in there...you are doing great!